Tuesday, October 2, 2012

Wicked Haunt-o-ween with Gerald Costlow

This Contest is Closed. The winner is Shadow.  Congratulations!

KAREN: Gerald Costlow is a multi-published author of paranormal romances and he's here today to share a TRUE Halloween tale from his past. Beware: The tale is a stinkin' good treat!! 

CONTEST: Gerald is offering a print (US only) or ebook copy (International) of the 2012 Fall/Paranormal Collection to one lucky commenter. Read on to find out all the details. CONTEST ENDS OCT. 9TH AT 12:01 AM PST.  The winner will be announced in the comments of this post. Good luck!

The Night Someone Fell In.
by G. Costlow

The first thing you need to know, if you ain’t from the country, is that an outhouse is a small wood shack downwind of the main house, sitting over a hole in the ground, containing a bench and maybe a roll of paper.  The bench has either a single butt-sized opening in it, or one adult and one child size opening.  How deep the hole is varies according to the water table, how rocky the ground might be, or how much you’re willing to pay someone to dig another hole for you.  It can get mighty odiferous inside a mature outhouse in the summer.

Eugene Crouse, being from the country, knew this.

The second thing you need to know, if you ain’t from the country, is that these privy holes get filled up eventually with the end product of fine country cooking.  Once the contents of the hole reach a certain level, another hole will be dug and the outhouse dragged over to sit on top of the new privy hole.  The old hole is filled in with dirt from the new hole.  It’s because of this that outhouses are never attached to the ground, built light enough for a man to move with the help of a tractor and some rope, and a strong wind has been known to blow one over occasionally.

Eugene Crouse, having dug his share of privy holes, knew this.

The third thing you need to know, if you ain’t from the country, is that every Halloween a bunch of bored, high-spirited teenage boys will go around tipping over outhouses, a prank that is harmless enough unless you happen to be sitting inside one at the time the boys came by, and unless they tipped the outhouse so the door was on the ground.  Like what happened to Mister Muggins last Halloween.  It was an hour before Missus Muggins came out for her nightly sit-down and discovered his predicament.

Eugene Crouse, being one of the high-spirited boys involved, knew this.

So this year, Mister Muggins decided to get even by waiting until Halloween night, and then taking his tractor and some rope and moving his outhouse about six feet further from the house so the open privy hole and its odorous contents were exposed.  He figured anyone stumbling around in the dark that night looking for his outhouse was in for a nasty surprise.

Eugene Crouse didn’t know this but it didn’t matter.  He’d arranged to meet Darlene Smith in a hay loft that night because he’d discovered something better than tipping over outhouses.

It was unfortunate that Mister Muggins didn’t think to tell Missus Muggins what he done before she went out for her nightly sit-down.

GERALD: I'm excited to have my story, "Magic Words", included in Victory Tales Fall Anthology.  This is my attempt to write a modern, updated "Princess and the Frog" type fairy tale.  I also wanted to begin writing a series of stories that take a look at the descendents of the characters in my ongoing 1920's Appalachia series.  Once the characters came to life on the page they took over the story and the ending even surprised me.  That always happens with the really good ones.

CONTEST:  I'll send a copy of the Fall anthology (choice of paper or ebook if in the USA, ebook if outside) to a commenter chosen at random.  If they already have a copy of the anthology, I'll send them a copy of my first novel, "The Weaving". HOW TO ENTER: Answer the questions: Have you ever played a trick on someone? If you answered yes, tell us about it. Please make sure to leave your email so I can contact you if you should win. Thank you.

"Magic Words"

Felipe Caballero is a Spanish conquistador who found the fountain of youth when all others failed. He drank from it and became immortal...an immortal frog. Now Felipe is able to assume human form only on the anniversary of his transformation—All Hallows' Eve, now known as Halloween.

It's four hundred years later, it's Halloween, and Felipe has twenty-four hours to find a way to lift his curse. He meets Evelyn, a woman who might be able to help, but only if he can convince her he's not crazy and avoid complications that might delay his desperate quest.

Complications such as Evelyn falling in love with an immortal frog...

If you like this story, you might enjoy reading my other published tales, available in ebook and paper.  You can find information on them by going to http://theweaving.blogspot.com/   I have a new novel coming out soon, published by Victory Tales, a supernatural romance titled "Crazy Jack" so watch for further announcements!


Rebecca J Vickery said... Best Blogger Tips

LOLLOL - I'm sure this was not funny to poor Missus Muggins, but having experienced the joys of a privy many years ago it definitely brings back memories.
I really enjoy your down-home humor, Gerald, and always look forward to your next story.
A big thanks to Karen for hosting this event. Can't wait to see what else she has in store for us.

Karen Michelle Nutt said... Best Blogger Tips

This was such a great story. Loved it!! Poor Missus Muggins.

Sarah J. McNeal said... Best Blogger Tips

Your story cracked me up. I do know about outhouses since both of my grandparents had them--until more modern conveniences could be added.
Can you imagine the riot of news it would drum up now if people had outhouses? There would be an outcry of protest siting disease, stink and unsightly shacks by the home owners associations around the country. At least the dang things didn't get stopped up and back up into the tub. LOL
I have the Fall/Paranormal Collection and now, more than ever, I look forward to reading your story.
All the best to you, Gerald.

Gerald Costlow said... Best Blogger Tips

My Uncle Eugene was a character and boy could he tell stories. He was the oldest of three boys and always getting my other two uncles into trouble. We all lived together in one farmhouse and I remember them from teenagers and more like older brothers.

I love writing flash fiction but there's no money and limited market for it.

Cathy said... Best Blogger Tips

Oh my what a story! That was a 'trick'!
cnickol at verizon dot net

katsrus said... Best Blogger Tips
This comment has been removed by the author.
katsrus said... Best Blogger Tips

LOL. Loved the story. Them outhouses can be nasty. I don't really playing a trick on anyone. I was always the one being tricked. LOL.
Sue B

cky15 said... Best Blogger Tips

cky15: It seems that some people for get that we used them. How we try to forget about the smell LOL
But this I had never thought of.
thanks for the LOL

Anonymous said... Best Blogger Tips

Great story and a true! I've never played a trick and thank goodness never had one done on me. lol


Rebecca J Vickery said... Best Blogger Tips

My Hubby insisted I tell his story of being "tricked" when he was a boy. He had 2 older brothers who often made his life hard. The oldest brother, Tommy, brought him back from trick-or-treating and sent him in the house while Tommy went to check the chicken house door was closed. My hubby and his middle brother, Arnold, joined the family gathered around the old black & white TV in the sitting room. Suddenly they heard a scratching sound at the window. Arnold walked over, looked out, saw nothing, and returned to the sofa. This happened several times, until finally my hubby crept over to peek out the window. A horrible hound face appeared in the window accompanied by a Banshee scream. My Hubby back-pedaled so hard he hit Arnold and they flipped the sofa over backward. Tommy came in holding their old Walker Hound in his arms and laughing like a loon.
It almost makes me glad I didn't have brothers.

Jean MP said... Best Blogger Tips

Loved the story, I remember those outhouses! Not a trick player here, usually the one having a trick played on them
skpetal at hotmail dot com

Gerald Costlow said... Best Blogger Tips

Rebecca, that was a marvelous trick played! There's something about boys in particular when they reach a certain age that brings out the trickster in us.

LisaRayns said... Best Blogger Tips

Hehehe. Great story!

Shadow said... Best Blogger Tips

Hi! Great post! Poor Missus Muggins. I do have to admit, i have played a trick or two. :D And ive had them played on me too! :) Thanks for sharing!!

bn100 said... Best Blogger Tips

Nice post. No, I haven't.


Naomi Bellina said... Best Blogger Tips

Cute story! Halloween pranks can be fun, or not so fun, depending on which side you're on.

Karen Michelle Nutt said... Best Blogger Tips


I agree-- pranks are only fun if they aren't on you. lol

Gerald Costlow said... Best Blogger Tips

All right, I stuck the names in a hat, asked my Wife to reach in and pull out a slip, and drum roll...

7 3/4???

That's the tag out of the hatband, honey. Try again.

And the lucky winner is someone who goes by "Shadow"!

I will be emailing you for required info to send your prize out.

Karen Michelle Nutt said... Best Blogger Tips

Congratulations, Shadow!!!

Thanks again, Gerald for joining us for Wicked Haunt-o-ween!!

dusty katt said... Best Blogger Tips

Congratulations, Shadow

A great big thanks to you Gerald for the wonderful story. That made my day. :)